वेदना

 "If there is a meaning in life at all, then there must be a meaning in suffering." ~ Viktor E. Frankl

"All I knew was that there would be pain and there would be purpose." ~ David Goggins

These lines are intriguing. Why did these renowned and powerful authors relate life with pain and suffering? Why did they mention pain to be an inextricable part of our existence? These questions made me sink into my own story as a flashback.

I began churning through my childhood, teenage, adulthood, parenthood, and life as a professional. Just like any human, I too had experienced painful moments. The moments which no one would want experience again, even if you have the most courageous mind. To name a few- I lost my father when I and my siblings just started with our careers, faced gender-biases at work, witnessed my Mom's hustle and bustle in nurturing us single-handedly, and the most painful of all was seeing her on death bed for 2 weeks, struggling for life. 

After thinking day and night, I found one common aspect in all those painful moments and I realized that I experienced pain whenever I couldn't face reality.

Hang on! Here I am, today, alive! But, where is the pain? where did it go? Did it dissolve? Did it vanish somewhere? Or is it resting in my mind to pop up again?

I got the answer to all these disturbing questions that were creating chaos in my mind. Each specific life comes with its own personalized portion of pain." The painful moments have become part of my "Cookie Jar". Yes, a Cookie Jar.

In his book, "Can't Hurt Me", "the toughest man alive" David Goggins says that your Cookie Jar is a special treat that you give to yourself. It's a collection of all the obstacles that you've overcome, restarted at times, fought with some critical illness, travelled through some most difficult roads of your life, the failures once; which you tried again and succeeded later, overcame depressions, or stood up again after falling from heights. Next time when you experience pain, take a moment and pick up a cookie from that cookie jar which tells you that you've all the courage to bear the pain and you're the only person who did this, this, and this in the history. And, there you are! Remember, there will be forks in the road, knives in your back, mountains to climb, and we are capable of living upto the self image we create for ourselves.

--Jyoti Nerkar